Of Mental Toughness

One of the things I have realized (not understood, realized) is that there is nothing that I cannot do. There is nothing that you cannot do either. All that stops us is simply HOW badly we want it.

One of my all-time favourite movies is The Thomas Crowne Affair (the one made in the 90s with Pierce Brosnan, not the original one with the Rat Pack). There is a great line from it: "Anything's obtainable". I thought it was cool how Pierce Brosnan was saying it at that time. Now it's simply a fact of life.

This realization isn't quite as liberating as it might seem to be. For someone who's not a natural optimist, it's hard - it now means that everything I do in life, is a choice. It means the words I say, the people I associate with, the jokes I crack, the doodles I doodle, the noodles I eat, when I wake up, when I sleep, what I choose to do, which MBA college I go to, which MBA college I get rejected from - EVERYTHING is by my choice. Because everything, suddenly, is under my control.

You know what the irony behind this is? I found that anybody is capable of doing anything because of my life and work in India. It's funny because India is BY FAR the country which believes (relies?) most on destiny. I totally agree with Arun Sarin, ex-CEO of Vodafone, on his comment that one of the Indian values is a "heavy dose of fatalism".

Here's the thing about knowing that everything in life is a choice. It means that 1) You need to be VERY VERY clear on what you want out of life and 2) You gots to be strong. Not physically tough. But mentally very strong. And there is probably nobody more inspiring in that regards than Tiger Woods. I think about this article about him almost every day. Here's an excerpt:

During the broadcast of Monday's playoff round, Nike ran an ad that had Earl Woods's voice running over images of his son: "I'd say, 'Tiger, I promise you that you'll never meet another person as mentally tough as you in your entire life.' And he hasn't. And he never will."

You can like this model or not. Either way, the legend grows.

The Frozen Gaze by David Brooks, NY Times, June 17, 2008

Does this mean that only the mentally strong i.e. those who are willing to give what it takes to achieve what they want are the only ones destined to be happy in this world? Or, in the words of Sheryl Crow (I know), is happiness "wanting what you got"? Do you have to have and KNOW your ultimate goal in life? Or will destiny take you where you are supposed to go?

I don't know. Which means I'm rooting for destiny.

Source For Change on Economic Times!

Source For Change, an all-women rural BPO based right here in Bagar, Rajasthan and incubated at the GDL, is now in the papers! Check it out:

http://epaper.timesofindia.com/Repository/ml.asp?Ref=RVRNLzIwMDgvMDYvMjQjQXIwMTIwMA==&Mode=HTML&Locale=english-skin-custom

Be sure to also check out their brand new website: www.sourceforchange.in

- Ashish

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For exciting opportunities to really make a change at the grassroots level, join GDL (www.gdl.org.in). Current posts are:
(1) GDL Director
(2) Program Manager - Entrepreneurship Development
(3) Program Manager - Community Leadership

Off the beaten path...

...I'm Not.

I finally succumb to the great Indian (with a capital I) entertainment extravaganza called the IPL. For the as yet uninitiated, and there shouldn't be many, since even the NY Times is carrying the news on the IPL these days: IPL stands for the Indian Premier League - a cricket league where the franchises, with fantastic names like the Kolkata Knight Riders and the Bangalore Royal Challengers, battle it out in the Twenty20 overs version of the cricket. Best part - it's like the English Premier league: there's sick amounts of money (SICK - and the salary cap is coming OFF next year), there's international stars (as usual, the Aussies rock), and an international TV following. Unlike the EPL, there's cheerleaders (which, btw, are probably what people come to watch the matches), every match is studded by Bollywood stars (who are bigger than the sport at these games), and the skill level isn't all that high. Well, that's for snobs (like me?) who think that this "version" of the game highly dilutes the skill quotient. It does. There are none of the orthodox drives, the patience, the timing of the ball etc etc. It is बिंदास गल्ली किरकेट (bindass galli cricket ~ No worries alley cricket).

Which is probably why it touches the heartstrings of so many Indians. Finally, you get to see people being paid your entire life-earnings in 3 hours for doing EXACTLY what you do for free in your own alley. There is no skill involved, बस धन धनाधन देते जाओ (just keep whacking at the ball basically). And you have to admit - it IS entertaining. It's just like baseball (for those uninitiated to cricket itself "gasp, horror"): nobody comes to watch the pitchers pitch well, non? People come for the batting, the runs.

And runs are in ample supply at these games. There's just something exciting about this bite-size version of the game that you'd wanna just eat it up. This recent tendency of gobbling up bite-size anything is probably the reason behind my recently expanding waistline (if you haven't noticed from all the pics yet).

So yah - I go tomorrow with 4 others at GDL to watch this match. A respite from a busy week at GDL (is there any other? Well, this one didn't START busy at least). Between the Rajasthan Royals (go team Rajasthan) and the Delhi Daredevils. In celebration of Radhika's b'day (but, alas, she'll be at home preparing for her GMATs, along with our brand new English trainer and his wife).

And as I sit there in mighty expensive seats (I pay more for that 3 hours of entertainment than my Teaching Assistant gets in half a month), undoubtedly a part of my guilt-ridden mind (uff, how do I get rid of this negativity) will be thinking about the precise subject of this post: how off the beaten track is this?

And does it matter? I mean, isn't intentionally doing something different just an ego boost that says - I'm not like the others, I'm special, Better?!? Or as every smart businessman will tell you, it's the only way to sustain a business - what's your differentiator? Couldn't I be spending this time finding a way to make सांगरी का अचार (sangri pickle - sangri being a famous Rajasthani vegetable that grows on the khejdi tree), as I had planned. Where I'd get this stuff, find some women to make it, market it, and give 'em the money? Or maybe actually paying a visit to Swami uncle to see how he's doing after his fever? Or going to the wake of my Teaching Assistant's grandfather?

No, those are not questions of the beaten track. Those are not even just questions of a busy schedule and/or prioritizing (remind me to write long about that one day). These are simply questions of a guilty and confused mind whose integrity is being called into question. And that question of integrity, of what I believe I am, what I say I am, and how I act, is because of the central theme of my entire life: shifting identities.

I came, I saw, I became Indian. But with two months before I go back to the US, I will now leave, I will now see and re-see, and I do not know what I will become.

I guess you could say I'm just On The Cusp ;-). Welcome to the blogging world my friend.

Good night.

Pictures from Bauji's Visit

My grandparents came to visit today. It was especially cool because my नानाजी (Nanaji - mom's father) had come all the way from Bombay. He came along with my grandparents and aunt who are in Delhi. Although it was a short visit, and we didn't have much conversation, it felt good that he had finally visited, and could visualize some of the things when I speak to him. It's also nice to share your life with your family I suppose.

And the memories, of course, are priceless.

20080501-BaujiVisitToBagar2

Sankrant in the Gaanv (गांव में संक्रांत)

Long overdue pictures. As you all know, Sankrant comes on Jan 14 every year (actually, this year it somehow fell on Jan 15). Naman and I went to my गांव (gaanv = native village = birthplace of my father/forefathers), and Naman's fancy digital SLR camera helped take some GREAT photos

Enjoy!

Sankrant Pictures

A Hindi site for drivers

I know the subject is very misleading.

It's not a site for the मुश्टन्डा (?), truck-hauling kind. Though I wish there was - imagine an India where these truck drivers could pitstop and find the nearest kiosk and check-in with their logistical company, provide an update to the customer and/or destination, and send a quick email to their loved ones. Plus, access entertainment to refresh themselves after the long hard bone-jarring not-for-the-faint-hearted drive on Indian roads (as Bryan would say, "India - Balls Out")


It's something altogether practical. It's a website for finding drivers for computer equipment. In Hindi. Given that the tech world remains strictly a domain for the English-speaking elite of India (and believe me, once you step out of Bombay, you realize it's an elite), this is a great start. I personally have problems with my current Teaching Assistant and other instructors I've had in learning how to maintain computers simply because of the communication barrier. What people would pay for hardware and software maintenance guides in Hindi. The market is actually close to phenomenal.

Without further ado: here's the site

www.nodevice.com

Let me know what you think.

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On an unrelated note, this incident reminded me of the origin of Bryan's quote about how India is balls out. When he came to visit me in Bagar in Oct 2007, we actually decided to go to Zayka (a restaurant in Jhunjhunu) to celebrate something or the other. Jhunjhunu is 15 km away, and there's usually buses every 10 minutes throughout the day. Somehow, we managed to pick the quietest hour of the day (around 8:15p), and no bus came till 9pm. Getting antsy (and promising myself I'd have me some delicious naan that night), I flagged the next vehicle, which happened to be a tractor laden with bricks. Well, the guy said yes, and 7 of us hopped on top of a tractor and took a good rickety hour to get to Jhunjhunu. It was a full moon's night (and the brightest moon of the YEAR on top of that), and there was the cool night wind of the fall - it was a surreal and unforgettable experience.

Bryan, however, was sitting right at the back of the tractor (where things shake more). He wasn't quite amused. In his own words, "I'd rather jump off a plane without a parachute then do that again".

In Preeti's words, "Bryan shat a brick"

To Jhunjhunu on a Full Moon's Night